Shards of Skye (The Skye Chronicles Book 1) Page 11

  “Actually I do prefer black to anything else. Yes, I feel that my soul has been blackened by everything I’ve gone through in my life, but I also just like it.” Skye suddenly hated feeling as if she were defending herself.

  “Calm my girl. I’m not here to judge you. I’m here to help you.” she said. “I sense you feeling lost and upset. I don’t want that for you. Tell me what can I do for you?”

  “I know you hate Maddox for what he is, which is not his choice by the way, but I need help. His father once came after me when I was a kid and graduation is coming up soon. Maddox said that my skin glows more now and it’s obvious to other supernaturals that I’m like them. He’s terrified that his father will kidnap me or kill me. I’m afraid too.”

  “You could dump the boyfriend.” Nanna said. There was no hope in her voice. Skye shook her head.

  “Not going to happen Nanna.” Skye said with a smile. She had expected that.

  “You are just like your mother.”

  “My… I am? How am I?” Skye asked desperate to know.

  “She fell in love with your father Gary, and even though she knew she wasn’t allowed to keep him, she defied her family. Then came you.” Nanna didn’t sound mad or even disappointed telling the story. Skye thought she sounded almost proud.

  “Why did her family force her to give me and him up?”

  “Skye, there’s so much more to the story that you don’t know. The answers will come in time, but for now just know that she knew it was the safest thing to do for both of you. She has always regretted it. Why do you think she sent me here to watch over you?”

  “My mom sent you? So she’s alive? Is she here too?” Skye felt her heart rate speed up at the thought.

  “She is alive. And no, she isn’t here. She’s in our home realm. I haven’t talked with her since she sent me here.” Nanna sounded sad. She obviously missed her daughter.

  “I want to meet her. I’ve dreamt of what it would be like to have my mom in my life. I want it more than I even know how to express. Is there any way I can see her?” Skye felt ready to beg. She had never wanted anything so much in her life, but had never said the words out loud before.

  “You would have to travel to our home for that. She cannot come back here. Her energy shines through so brightly that she would be a huge target for all supernaturals. The way you are glowing to me now makes me worry that you are on the same path.” Nanna said as she looked her over.

  “It’s been getting stronger and brighter. I think it’s my fault.” Skye admitted.

  “You’ve been practicing your powers?” she questioned.

  “Yes, but Maddox doesn’t know.” This caught her Nanna by surprise.

  “Why would you hide that? Demons love it when elves grow into their powers. They taste better to them and know they will never be able to get away.”

  Skye smiled with a nod.

  “Exactly! He doesn’t want that to happen. He doesn’t want his father to find me and hurt me or turn me into his son’s sex slave. Then there’s Maddox who doesn’t want me to be a temptation to him in that way. He basically wants me to be human. He thinks it would be safer for me.”

  Nanna thought for a moment then put her hand on Skye’s shoulder.

  “If that’s true and you love him so much then why would you go against his wishes to keep you safe?”

  “He’s going to end up sacrificing his own life to save me at graduation. I can’t sit back and let him fight for me knowing that he could possibly die while I run away to stay safe. I’m not that kind of person. I never will be. And I love him. I plan to fight by his side.” Skye looked determined and Nanna seemed to know better than to argue with her.

  “If you are going to fight, you need to tap into your real powers.” she said.

  “Wait, does that mean you’re going to help me?” Skye asked hopeful.

  “I am. I’m also going to make sure you have an ‘out plan’ in case it goes sour.”

  “What sort of ‘out plan’?” Skye looked suspicious.

  “Opening a portal and sending you back to your mother.”

  Skye’s mouth opened in shock. She wanted to meet her mother so badly she could practically taste it. Suddenly she felt full of hope for once, instead of dread or the darkness that used to consume her soul before Maddox entered it and brought his own light into her heart and soul.

  “I can do this.” Skye whispered.

  Maddox stood in front of the mirror in his bedroom. He looked at his own reflection wishing he was actually looking at someone else. The man in the mirror was covered in blood. The man in the mirror hurt and even murdered people just hours before. Maddox closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes the same monster still stared back at him. Before he knew what he was doing, his fist broke the mirror into a thousand small pieces around him.

  Maddox sighed as he looked at his fist. A shard of glass was protruding from his skin. He pulled it out and tossed it to the floor along with the other shattered remains. Stepping over the glass, he turned his shower on. He found himself staring at the blood on his hands again and forced himself to step into the shower. He watched the drain as the blood started to leave his body and swirl to the bottom of the shower.

  It swirled in circles almost resembling a peppermint candy cane. Only this ‘candy cane’ was a puddle of blood mixed with water and it held his shame. It held worse than that. Secrets within him swirled along the bottom of the shower around his feet as the blood slowly disappeared down the drain. Although the blood was disappearing, he felt as if he could see it still. Soap and water would never take the blood completely away from him. Nothing could do that now.

  He knew this wasn’t the man he wanted to be. It surely wasn’t the man he wanted for Skye. He also knew deep within him that the demon he was relished it. He never wanted to be a self-loathing supe.

  Supernaturals that hated themselves for their own nature had always pissed him off and now he was one of those loathsome creatures. Part of him wondered if that was better than embracing the creature he truly was.

  The blood poured from the wound on his hand making him silently curse himself. He knew he needed stitches for the wound. After he managed to scrub every inch of his body clean, he wrapped a towel around his waist and walked into his bedroom.

  He grabbed his first-aid kit, pulling out the needle to close the wound in his hand. This was something he had done many times before, yet somehow it felt worse this time. Worse because of Skye. She was in his thoughts as usual.

  “I see you got into a fight with something pointy and apparently you lost.” Buck said as he walked into the room smiling.

  “The mirror pissed me off.” Maddox replied as he stuck the needle into his hand.

  “My mirror never pisses me off. How could it when it shows the hotness that is me?” Buck joked.

  “You are a cocky S.O.B. aren’t you?” Maddox lifted the corner of his mouth in a fake smile.

  “What happened?” Buck asked as he flopped onto the couch across from his cousin. Buck had silently been watching the path his cousin was going down and knew he could do nothing to help him. Nothing except to let Maddox get it off of his chest.

  “I punched the mirror.”

  “Thanks for stating the obvious dip-shit. Why? What’s up?” Maddox blew out a breath of frustration as he finished sewing up his hand.

  “Does it matter? We’re demons. We’re supposed to break shit and be pissed off aren’t we?” Maddox looked up at Buck almost challenging him to disagree.

  “You fighting with Skye or something?” Girl trouble, Buck thought with a roll of his eyes.

  When Maddox didn’t answer Buck rolled his eyes again then shifted his body on the couch to get more comfortable for the obvious bitch fest he felt was about to start. Maddox knew Buck hated to be ignored but he couldn’t force himself to care. He was busy hating himself and then hating himself for hating himself. It was an endless cycle of hatred that Maddox feared he would
never escape or even understand.

  “I am truly screwed up.” Maddox finally said.

  “Who isn’t screwed up man?”

  “Normal people. People who aren’t demons.”

  “Oh.” Buck said looking his cousin over. “I didn’t realize I walked into a pity party or I would have brought balloons. No wait, ice cream! Ice cream is for pity parties’ right?”

  “Shut up. You embrace being a damn demon but I don’t have to. I want to be better than this. I don’t want to come home covered in blood. What kind of man does that make me?” Maddox leaned back on the couch frustrated.

  “I guess it makes you the same type of man that I am or any other member of your family is.”

  “I don’t want to be that man anymore Buck.” He groaned. “I want to be a man that deserves respect, not one that takes it through fear.”

  “Bullshit.” Buck nearly snarled the word. “This is about Skye. You want to be a fucking goodie two shoes for her!” Maddox growled sitting up straight.

  “So what if I do? I’m not allowed to want to be a good person? I have to want to be evil? That’s crap. I should have a choice on what I do with my own life!”

  “Geez.” Buck jumped off the couch debating on whether he should punch Maddox or leave him alone.

  “You don’t get it. You’ve been doing my dad’s dirty work for too long.”

  “You know what Maddox? Maybe I have! But I also know that you can’t fight what or who you are. No one can.”

  “I can damn well try.” Maddox said through his teeth.

  “I respected the fact you wanted to wait until you were out of school to join us. I respected your mom for wanting that for you, but you always knew it was headed this way. You start dating a good natured supe and all of a sudden you hate all of us?” Maddox stood up and looked his cousin in the eyes.

  “I’ve always hated what we were and you know that. I’ve just never complained about it before.” Maddox voice sounded tired. Suddenly the anger was overshadowed by despair. Buck paused as he looked at him.

  “I’ve seen you on the battlefield before. I’ve seen the look on your face when you cut someone in half. It was pure adrenaline and excitement running through you. I know because I feel the same way. So the truth is you hate it because you like it.” Maddox turned away from Buck. He couldn’t argue. He knew he was right.

  “I do like it. I feel invincible out there and I enjoy the fight. I hate myself for it.” He turned to face Buck again. “And yes, Skye does have something to do with it. I want to be a good man for her, but I also want to be that for myself. She is so much better than what we are and I want to be able to deserve her. If that makes me stupid or weak then so be it. I don’t care.”

  “Maddox, you’re a good guy. You always have been, but you are also a demon. You can’t defeat your father and you can’t walk away from this lifestyle without a fight. I don’t want to see you die at the hands of your own father. So I’m telling you to suck it up. Be who you are and screw the consequences of it.”

  “So I should just be a murderer because if I’m not then I’m going to be killed? Those are shitty choices man. Maybe I would rather be killed.”

  “Geez don’t go all emo on me man.”

  “It’s not emo. It’s frustration. I’m sick of this lifestyle and I want to escape it no matter the cost.”

  “What about Skye? As long as she’s with you she’s a target.” Buck said.

  “I know. That’s why I’m going to end things with her.”

  “The hell you are!” Buck said in disbelief.

  “I am. I love her and because of that I have to let her go.” Maddox’s face was covered in pain. It was such a deep pain that Buck was shocked to see it.

  “She’s never going to let you walk away to save her. She’s way too stubborn for that.” Buck felt bad for his cousin. He knew how much he loved Skye and knew how bad it would hurt for Maddox to lose her.

  “Yeah. She is too stubborn for that. That’s why I’m going to do the one thing that will make her hate me so that she won’t want me anymore. I won’t give her a choice in the matter.”

  Buck’s eyes widened a fraction. He knew there was only one thing that could make Skye leave Maddox… another woman.

  Chapter Eleven

  Skye sat with Maddox on her couch as they watched TV. She noticed he had been more silent than usual over the past few weeks. He never elaborates as to why. She was too afraid to ask. She had started to worry that he had found out she was secretly using her powers with her Nanna. She knew that if he had known, he would have confronted her, so part of her knew it couldn’t be that.

  She stroked his large hand softly. The cut on his hand had healed but left a scar behind. He had never told her how it happened and brushed it off whenever she would ask. She feared it had something to do with his dad so she didn’t push him on it.

  Graduation was only days away and she wanted to discuss the plan, but he always seemed so far away whenever she would even try to bring the subject up. Skye sighed sitting up straight and looked him in the eyes.

  “We can’t keep pretending everything is normal, Maddox. We need to face the fact that graduation is coming up and figure out what we are going to do.”

  He looked her in her eyes to see the reflection of what looked like sadness from his own. Skye tapped her finger impatiently as he sat silent in front of her.

  “Maddox, I’m not asking you to pick me over your family. I would never do that.” He shook his head slowly.

  “Skye, that’s not even an issue trust me.”

  “Then what is going on? You have been distant lately.” Maddox nodded.

  “Yeah.” He said with a shrug. Skye groaned.

  “You’re mad at me. Damn it how did you find out? I’ve been so careful not to get caught. I’m sorry okay? I don’t want you mad at me but I have to do this. I can’t fight who I am anymore.” Maddox’s body went stiff. His eyes were cold and hard as he looked at her.

  “You’re apparently confessing something but I’m a little lost as to what.” Skye rolled her eyes.

  “Don’t play with me. I know you know. I’m sorry that you’re upset but I had to find her. I had to know who I am and learn how to protect myself. I know you want to protect me, Maddox, but I’ve basically been taking care of myself my whole life. I’m not just going to stop now.” Maddox stood up from the couch and looked down at her.

  “You’ve been using your powers.” It wasn’t a question. He looked at her and was both relieved and mad at the same time. He had been so frustrated not understanding why her body seemed to glow even more to him every day. He had begun to think it was just his paranoia. He was instantly mad now that he knew she was doing what he never wanted her to do.

  “Skye, are you trying to drive me insane? It’s too dangerous for you to use your powers. I knew your skin was shining more and more. I thought I was going insane but no… you are doing this on purpose!” He turned away from her as he fought his emotions.

  He wanted her protected and for Skye to be able to protect herself, especially if he was going to end things with her. The thought of ending anything with her made him wince in pain. He felt as if a lance had been shoved straight through him. Maddox had to fight the emotion because he also wanted her safe from all supes when they were no longer together. If her skin continued to glow as it was doing due to her powers, he knew she would never truly be safe.

  “I’m sorry you’re upset but I’m not sorry for doing it. I need this. I need to know my grandmother and need to be able to defend myself.” He turned back to face her.

  “Do you realize that it’s harder for me to resist you when your light is shining so bright? That the demon inside of me hungers for the light inside of you? It causes me physical pain to resist you but I do because…” he growled angrily.

  “I’m not trying to hurt you. I would never do that.” Skye frowned. She had feared he would notice her powers growing but didn’t stop to think of the co
nsequences between them. He admitted to her before that he hungered for her blood and when someone like her was more powerful that it was even harder for him to resist.

  She hung her head in shame at the thought of causing the man she loved pain, but she knew she couldn’t depend on anyone else to save her. She had to save herself.

  “Well you are, Skye.” he mumbled.

  “I’m sorry for that. I really am but I can’t fight who I am! I’m an elf and I have to embrace that. I have to be stronger than what I have been. I’m strong enough to stand by your side and fight with you.”

  Maddox groaned at the thought of her fighting by his side. He wanted to hide her from that side of him. He never wanted her to see the monster that he was capable of being. He thought of himself in the shower watching the blood that had leaked slowly in spirals into the drain. The thought of blood touching her perfect alabaster skin made him shiver.

  “That’s never going to happen.” He faced her putting his hands on her cheeks cupping them gently.

  “Maddox please just understand.” she whispered.

  “No, you understand. I can’t do this. I can’t fight by your side. I can’t let you see me that way. I cannot and will not let you be near my father when there is a chance you will be harmed. I don’t care if that makes me a Neanderthal or sexist or a pig. All I care about is your safety.”

  Skye placed her hands over his with a sad smile. She licked her lips and prepared herself for a fight, but he shocked her by crushing her body against his and taking her mouth with his own. He was hungry for her and feral.

  The loss of control scared Skye only slightly, yet it made her need him even more. She wrapped herself around him in every way she possibly could.

  The quick change in his mood frightened her. Even more it excited her. Skye threw all thoughts of fighting him to the back of her mind. She opened her mouth to his warm lips and expert tongue. The kiss pushed past the point of want and entered into the zone of pure need. The need she felt from him was intense. She had never felt him losing control like this before.